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	Ain't Nobody's Business A Lament for St. Patrick A Pair of Brown Eyes Blood Lust Blood Oath Call of the Crow Celtic Ring of Fire Chain of Slaves Closer to Eleven Concussare Anthem Destination Isle of Mann Do it Right Dying Celt Earth Song Fop Hunt I'm a Wild Celt	Knockin' On Atlantian Heads Lager & Blood Nationwide Of the Bog Painted Up in Blue Preachain Preachain Song Ritual of Lughnasadh Sally MacLennane Sheela-Na-Preachain Stal-la-la-la-la-la-Leo-Hagan The Favor The Mundane Blues The Woad Warrior of the Celts War Song
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Ain't Nobody's Business by Rael and Lyra filk: Tain't Nobody's Business by P. Granger & E. Robbins One day We had cattle and flocks And the next day We had our neighbor's cattle and flocks And it ain't no No neighbor's business Havin' cattle and flocks One day Danu was on the land Then the Christians came And they got outta hand And it ain't no No Christian's business How I pray

A Lament for St. Patrick by Ceara ni Neill I strolled along the glen one day A shepherd, in the field he lay He smiled at me and said, "how do?" Says I, what e'er your fancy be. He smiled at me, then his face grew grim As he began a Christian hymn I said, "Stop fast!" My face aghast, For surely the gods you will offend! Patrick, aye, Patrick That stubborn Christian Patrick A curious fact that he should ever enter in priesthood. I bade him stop, but on he went Of Christ, and god and covenant Says I, "Please stop in Danu's name!" Says he, "exists there not the same." Patrick, aye Patrick, That stubborn Christian Patrick A curious fact his god forbids him taking earthly pleasures. A blow to the head did stun him well And the blade of my dirk made his blood swell; For since he cursed the God of Love, For purpose he needs not *that* of! Patrick, aye, Patrick, That silly Christian Patrick He dared to curse the goddess of love and paid he with his manhood! Come live with me and be my love and we will earthly pleasure prove! Or hill and vale, and stream and field- Till woods and steepy mountain yield! Patrick, aye Patrick That sad and silly Patrick O let us revel with all the gods for granting earthly pleasures!

A Pair of Brown Eyes by Shane MacGowan One summer evening drunk to hell I sat there nearly lifeless An old man in the corner sang Where the water lilies grow And on the jukebox Johnny sank About a thing called love And its how are you kid and what's your name And how would you bloody know In blood and death 'neath a screaming sky I lay down on the ground And the arms and legs of other men Were scattered all around Some cursed some prayed some prayed then cursed Then prayed then bled some more And the only thing that I could see Was a pair of brown eyes that was looking at me But when we got back labeled parts one to three There was no pair of brown eyes waiting for me. And a rovin' a roving' a rovin' I'll go For a pair of brown eyes I looked at him he looked at me All I could do was hate him While Ray and Philomena sang Of my elusive dreams I say the streams the rolling hills Where his brown eyes wee waiting And I thought about a pair of brown eyes That waited once for me. So drunk to hell I left the place Sometimes crawling sometimes walking A hungry sound came across the breeze So I gave the walls a talking And I heard the sounds of long ago From the old canal And the birds where whistling in the trees Where the wind was gently laughing And a rovin' a roving' a rovin' I'll go And a rovin' a roving' a rovin' I'll go And a rovin' a roving' a rovin' I'll go For a pair of brown eyes For a pair of brown eyes

Blood Lust by Aes and Phalen filk: some christian ditty It only takes a cut To get the red blood flowing When enemies are found Their heads will soon be rolling Chorus That's how it is with blood lust Once you're a warrior Your nostrils flare All spiked your hair You have a warp-spasm What a wondrous gift of Danu The power to slay armies Your eye starts from from its sphere That will be their only warning. Chorus

Blood Oath by Conn MacNeill Chorus Preachain, Preachain, for Clanne and for kinsmen, Preachain, Preachain, to battle we go Preachain, Preachain, for spears colored crimson, Preachain, Preachain, it's blood for the oath! There's a Clanne of bold temper, they're wild-eyed and clever, Their war-yell a death-knell for many a foe. The Morrigan's hammer, their song joyful clamor, They're oath-bound for sword-ground to keep a grim oath. Now the Senachal's spoken of a time long forgotten, When word-sign was tongue-plied by beats as by man, When the corn that they'd hoped for lay blighted and broken, And the Crow-king on coal-wing came swift to the Clanne. Chorus We'll no corn be taking, if to join in oath-making, You sword-swear no work-snare is set for the Crow. I'ts battle we're needing, on flesh and blood feeding, And red-gold to the sword-bold and their kinsmen will flow. In these words was wisdom, they bound themselves in them, A crow-sign or the war-line a token of faith, They armed and took hire, employed sword and fire, Took war-gear, gained word-fear and swept all away. Chorus From that time to this time, as spoken in fair rhyme, Preachain and the crow-band keep the unbroken oath, If you've stomach for warring than heed well my warning To the sword-bold give the war-gold or your flesh to the Crow! There's a Clanne of bold temper, they're wild-eyed and clever, Their war-yell a death-knell for many a foe. The Morrigan's hammer, their song joyful clamor, They're oath-bound for sword-ground to keep a grim oath. Chorus

Call of the Crow by Teague ap Cynan Chorus The call of the Crow is sacred and strong Reaching o'er mountain and distances long Whoever is willing it leads as in song. Whoever is not gets themselves dragged along I heard the call in the bright light of day In the heat of battle my foes at bay It guided my sword and led me to slay It led me to life and victory that day. Chorus I heard the call in the softness of night As my mind was standing at dreams twilight It came without dread. It came without fright And fast took my soul without any fight Chorus Now I've answered the call among kindred friends. I send you my song for so my heart bends And though far away my spirit still sends Blessings to Preachain upon the four winds. Chorus

Celtic Ring of Fire by "Those Wacky Dahlradians" filk: Ring of Fire, tune originally recorded by Johnny Cash When Caesar came to Albion He vowed to conquer all he saw. We drove old Caesar form our shore The legions muttered, "Nevermore!" Chorus He fell down into a Celtic ring of fire He went down, down, down, but the flames leapt higher! And he burned, burned burned, that Roman tyrant, That Roman tyrant! A Roman in a wickerman Scrams like only Romans can We danced around his funeral pyre We gave him to the God of Fire! Chorus When smashing down the walls of Rome Brennus drove his lesson home! "Woe to the vanquished" was his word! Upon the scales, he threw his sword. Chorus When Boudicca did lead the clannes They slaughtered Romans in the glens She chose to die upon her feet Than live like Romans on their knees! Chorus

Chain of Slaves by Aes filk: Chain of Fools by D. Conway (as recorded by Aretha Franklin) Chorus Chain chain chain, Chain chain chain Chain chain chai-ee-ay-ee-ay-ee-ay-ee-ayn, yeah Chain of slaves. For five long years You been raiding my land You stole my cattle And you threatened my Clanne I'm gonna put you in my tin mine Make you my slave For you have no honor, No, you are not brave Chorus (Bridge) (Ooo, ooo) Well, I told you to come alone (Ooo, ooo)But you brought warriors from your hold (Ooo, ooo)I slew them all in my rage, but you I left alone You're my slave now Chorus Well one of these days That chain is gonna break That will be the day I Sacrifice you to the lake Chorus Chorus

Closer to Eleven by Rael filk: Closer to Fine by the Indigo Girls We traveled to the Spice Wars of Atlantia With many bottles of good brew and the food that we love best The Acorn said the party would be a big one So we set out to get shit-faced and have much fun This was war practice after all Yeah...right. Into our camp came good friends from Dalhradia With good songs and good cheer within their hearts Then suddenly the trees parted before us There stood an anal retentive who proceeded to bore us He was Atlantian, after all Chorus We started at our camp And moved on to their camp But everywhere we tried it The fops got so excited And the more I think about it an look back in time I wish I'd splintered all their spines And I must keep and eye on the time The closer it gets to eleven, oh---------- The closer it gets to eleven, oh---------- I need to seek out Steelye of Dalhradia And bring to Dr. Love my tales of woe Each morning when he wakes up (Rael says) I have a real huge boner It sticks out of our tent flap And tends to knock thing over I've spent long years trying hard to tie it down But no chain can stand the strain Chorus Well I stumbled by the fire at three a.m. To seek solace in the woad bowl and dance naked with some friends I woke up to the sound of some butthead with a kazoo Playing with a pistol because his penis had been removed Limp sheep-sticking buttery-butt fop Chorus The Autocrat and Seneschal soon joined us To fill their horns and party by our sides Just shows you that there are a few exceptions To the other Atlantians with lubricated rectums Limp sheep-sticking buttery-butt fop Chorus

Concussare Anthem By Steelye Filk: You Betcha Chorus We are the Celt-Iberiena Concussare You'll hear our wings of death from afar Feel the icy fingers close around your heart Here we are...Concussare! And when we meet the foemen on the field You'll find the Concussare never yield Bringing death with every weapon that we wield Arrow spear, sword and shield Chorus And when the foeman gets in a good shot The Concussare never says he did not Honor is the most important thing we've got Life or death matter not Chorus When you see the Concussare appear You'll learn a new meaning for the word fear Take unto your heel if you hold your life dear Or be known from the rear Chorus And when the fighting's over, day is done The Concussare Party second to none Men and women drink and fuck until the dawn Concussare! Concussare! Chorus We are the ROMPIN', STOMPIN' Concussare There's some debate over which sex we are None can match the lust and fury in our hearts Here we are Concussare! Chorus (repeat ad nauseam)

Destination Isle of Mann by Lyra filk: Destination Anywhere by The Commitments Said to the man in the pulpit preachin' My goddess takes good care of me He said I didn't say you could choose But either way I would lose, oh... Destination Isle of Mann To make a homeland for my Clanne You see the Christians don't want us around "Cause we won't kneel upon their holy ground He looked at me with my woaded face and hair He said, You're a sinner and you better beware. I said, if you ever loved the land and all her creatures too, Surely Mr. Preacher man, you could love Danu! Oh... Destination Isle of Mann To make a homeland for my Clanne You see the Christians don't want us no more As they have vowed to wage a holy war But if they winwe won't cower in fear We won't go back to darkened yesteryears When we were down upon our knees And not a one of us was free... I looked out from my hillfort in the rain I thought I heard the goddess call my name But it was just the preacher sayin' My lord is gonna make you pay Oh... Destination Isle of Mann To make a homeland for my Clanne You see the preacher may have won this time But someday we will spill his blood like wine

Do It Right by Lyra and Rael filk: Treat her Right by Roy Head I'm gonna tell you a story Every Celt oughta know If you wanna kill fops You gotta do it real slow You'll make 'em suffer tonight If you just do it right If you wanna sever heads And you wanna crush skulls You can do it with a pole-arm Or an arrow and a bow You'll take heads every night If you just do it right If you practice my method Just as hard as you can We're gonna get a reputation as a killin' clanne Lager and Blood every night 'Cause we're doin' it right Now you got a mess of heads And they're spitted on some pikes You gotta fill your horn with lager And stand beside the firelight And raise a toast up hight 'Cause the fops gotta die Hey, hey, hey, hey...Lager and Blood! Lager and Blood! Hey, hey, hey, hey...Lager and Blood! Lager and Blood! Hey, hey, hey, hey...Lager and Blood! Lager and Blood! Hey, hey, hey, hey...Lager and Blood! Lager and Blood! Hey, hey, hey, hey...Lager and Blood! Lager and Blood! Hey, hey, hey, hey...Lager and Blood! Lager and Blood!

Dying Celt by Rael As it comes to pass my life-blood's failing A slumbering sun a wave is reflecting I can smile. Breath in the power from every surrounding Look to the forest to help in reminding It's all here now. The fighting is over, the battle is won Sweetness of glory and bitter of blood I tasted now. Even the pain fits in the puzzle Why should I add to meaningless struggle? I fought well. It's time to return what I took from the earth, Give back what was borrows the day of my birth A glimpse of the sun with my last full breath What more could one ask of the moment of death?

Earth Song by Rael and Lyra In the whole of your lifetime there will never be A sight as sweet as sunshine on a calming sea The thunder of a waterfall The lonely aching of a dying white wolf's call She lies bleeding while we sit feeding on her naked wounded skin And yet she's still alive. Please tell us, Mother Earth how can we rescue you? Is there an ounce of wisdom in your morning dew? A potion in your smoldering fires A phoenix in your dying pyres? We are only lost and lonely, blind to our plight so dire. Please tell us, will we survive? Oh, come all ye faithful, gather round the wood We'll watch the spirits dance. I wish we only could Feel the flying falcon's soul Understand the breathing land and take its fold. Known the end of our agenda Can only be our demise. Please help us to stay alive. The moon is waking. I can feel her in my breath. She climbs the twilight sky and greets the daylight's death. She understand s the dolphin's cry She takes Orion's hand and settles in the sky. Ooo La Luna, stop weeping for our gloom Your tears won't quench the fire It's upon us that we must die I wake from dreaming of you bleeding acid rain I look beyond my coffin seeing just the same I breathe the foul and deadly air It's not my problem now why should I even care You are dying while all the time we're lying We've built our final fire It's come time for us to die. Mother breath lightly while you children settle down It's not so long ago we burned you to the ground. Open your arms and take us in Bestow upon us life and breath and cleanse our sins. Once a lifetime our civilization has a lifeline You put your finger on the end And give us time to be alive.

The Favor by Ceara ni Neill filk: Rossann nel coir (recorded by Scartaglen) Ireland's sun is shining today But my heart does not bask in it's rays For my lover has gone off to battle And he carried the favor of fair Faye. Promised he me never to leave, But to steal his heart Faye did achieve Now he leaves me, alone, to my own fate Since for her my love he did betray. Come they, come they, suitors aplenty; I send, I send them away For my lover, he's gone into battle, Though he carried the favor of fair Faye. Ireland's sun is shining today, But my heart does not bask in its rays. For my brothers have gone into battle For to gain my honor thrown away. And I went to the battlefield today And from his belt, pulled the favor of fair Faye.

Fop Hunt by Lyra and Rael filk: Moondance by Van Morrison It's a marvelous night for a fop hunt All their lace in the moonlight will glow. A fantabulous night to make fops run Through the barbed wire fences so low. And all their blood will be flowin' When I sever their heads! You know they won't be goin' 'Cause they'll be dead...oh, so dead! Chorus Can we just have one more fop hunt, Danu, tonight? Can we just make some more fops run, Danu, tonight? Well I wanna take heads with you tonight, I can't wait for the mornin' to come. And I know if I hold my spear just right, Then straight into the point fops will run. And all their spleens will be ruptured And their entrails will flow I'll slash their femoral arteries Then they'll run really slow! Chorus Well I'm walkin' around with a fop's head With his testicles shoved up his nose And I know I'll complete my collection With the rest of our buttery-butt foes And every time I kill one I just tremble and shake You know it feels so good To put their head on a stake! Chorus

I'm a Wild Celt by Rael and Lyra filk: Lumberjack Song by Monty Python Chorus I'm a wild Celt and I'm okay I drink all night and I sleep all day (He's a wild Celt and he's okay He drinks all night and he sleeps all day) I take lots of heads I eat good food I burn down Roman towns In the morning I drink coffee And try to avoid loud sounds I'm a wild Celt and I'm okay I drink all night and I sleep all day (In the morning he drinks coffee And tries to avoid loud sounds) I kill my foes And take their stuff I plunder my neighbor's land I wish I had a posey To carry in my hand I'm a wild Celt and I'm okay I drink all night and I sleep all day (He wished he had a posey To carry in his hand) I like white lace And stocking too I wish I had long nails I like to wear soft colors Perhaps with a matching veil I'm a wild Celt and I'm okay I drink all night and I sleep all day (He likes to wear soft colors Perhaps with a matching veil) (kill him at any point hereafter)

Knockin' On Atlantian Heads by Rael filk: Knockin' on Heaven's Door by Bob Dylan A tune told to us by an Atlantian piss-boy enslaved by Clanne Preachain and tortured into revealing his countrymen's song. Phalen take your broad sword off of me My ears are bleeding and I can't see My ribs are bruised, my legs are gone I'm out of ice, my beer is warm Chorus Knock knock knockin' on Atlantian heads Knock knock knockin' on Atlantian heads Knock knock knockin' on Atlantian heads Preachain's out knockin' on Atlantian heads Cellagh at the point, the hammer thrown Our line of Atlantians weep and moan Murder on the wing cast a shadow of dread They'll need an accountant to tally the dead Chorus Preachain approaches our wall of shields We will feed the crow this day We brace our line and prepare to die Peradur's grin makes grown men cry Chorus Maddog and the Dillo's cut through our lines Taking heads and snapping spines Goldmun's arms are two blurs of death Rael kills many with his bad breath Chorus The fighting's over the day is done All my warriors have got the runs We trudge away from the field in shame Preachain's so great and we're so lame Chorus

Lager and Blood by Teague ap Cynan There lives a Clanne whose people are true, Their hearts are Celtic and strong With honor as fierce as the woad is blue Preachain is the sould of my song Chorus Lager and Blood is the call, my friends Lager and Blood for the clanne Lager and Blood for the spirit within Lager and Blood for Preachain Chorus (Only Aes sings this part!) A leader whose wits could match any man A vessel for spirit and might A woman called Aes with justice and hand The opal that burns with inner light Chorus

Nationwide By Aes..."No apologies, it had to be done." Filk: Nationwide by ZZ Top Chasin' Romans down the road in my sleek chariot We're cuttin' down their legs and stabbin' 'em in the gut Kigva's got the reins, Peredur's got the axe We're taking Roman heads leavin' their bodies in the track 'Cuz we're bad, we're nationwide. Yeah, we're bad, Clanne Preachain. Wheeling left and right the murder sweeps the field Our warriors are bold many weapons do they yield Phalen's got his glave, Ros has got a spear Stalicho is nashin' , Finn is grinnin' ear to ear 'Cuz we're bad, we're nationwide. Yeah, we're bad, bad, bad, Clanne Preachain. The winds of the Crow spread from sea to sea We live through Danu's blessing, happy as can be May Lugh bless you if you praise our name, But we'll send you to Morrigan if you bring us shame. 'Cuz we're bad, we're nationwide. Yeah, we're bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, Clanne Preachain.

Of The Bog by Kigva and Lyra filk: Prince of Darkness by The Indigo Girls I don't know when I noticed fops were fops and really dense While the Romans in the war lined up like prisoners on a fence My greatest hope my greatest cause to fear Was when Danu's Dancers slayed all the warriors far and near The cries of Romans were like music to my ears I couldn't help but laugh and drink beer! I was half the naked distance between camp and the swimming hole And it made my head so clear, oh... Chorus Someone's in the Long Hall, desperate in his pain Someone's by the fire pit, now, tending to the flame Someone's got her sword in some fop who'd being a real bore No one can convince me we aren't the best at Pennsic War... And we tried to make this place our place We asked for Danu to smile down on us when we're shit-faced But I tell you... Our place is of the Bog and This place is of the flats I do not fear the Romans, I do not fear the fops, yeah Our place is of the Bog and This place is of the flats I do not fear the Romans, I do not fear the fops, yeah... Maybe there's no haven in the world for a wild Celt But a head on my sword no that's the best I've ever felt The Romans fought like feeble children, tugging at my sleeve I said I'll take your head and I will make you bleed There was a time that I asked Aes for a good beer She gave me a cask full of stout And when I needed my clannesmen and I called them Lager and Blood rang out, oh... Chorus

Painted Up in Blue By Maddog and Goldmun Filk: Tangled up in Blue by Bob Dylan We invoked the Morrigan on the field at Pennsic 22 The day we spread the carnage wide, the day our word-fame grew For what we'd done on the field that day They'd sing about that night All the enemies we didn't engage We're glad they didn't have to fight Those wild-eyed Celts from the Clanne of the Crow And the Armadillo's too And all the others that joined in our band With a Pictish point of view We're all painted up in blue We collected several severed heads, some we didn't wanna take We cut off all he fops with a butter knife Then we threw 'em in the lake We see the Saxon in the shade The amber merchant with the sweet child-bride Man he's really got it made As we headed back we realized there's one thing left to do We gotta stop by the Meridian camp and say howdy to Stonehue Then get painted up in blue Meanwhile backdown at the bog They were liftn' them a cup or two "Keep the lightweights out" said Aes with a shout If it looks like they're gonna spew!" And do a tune or two on a bodhran And once again Sean and Atrig stood guard To keep the Tuchux off of our lawn With such goin's on it wasn't long 'Til the men knew what they must do They shed their pants and did the manly dance And sang praises to Danu Painted up in Blue!

Preachain (unfinished) by Rael and Lyra filk: Cocaine by Erick Clapton When the battle is done Come to the camp that's fun Preachain When everywhere else is rot Come to the camp that's not Preachain We're so fine, we're so fine, we're so fine Preachain When you wanna get blue You know what to do Preachain Just take off your clothes Get woaded down to your toes Preachain We're so blue, we're so blue, we're so blue Preachain When it's a buzz that you needin' Go find Keogan and Eogan Preachain If you're in need of a beer Then have no fear Preachain We're so fine, we're so fine, we're so fine Preachain

Preachain Song by Ceara ni Neill We live in a world that is vile and wrong We look to each other to keep ourselves strong With respect to our culture we recreate the days And the best we know how practice all the ancient ways. The sky smiles above us to the earth beneath our feet On occasion if you listen, the winds laugh maniacally But the trees wave them quiet and the brook bubbles them still And the gods invite s out to play, to frolic at will. Chorus Preachain, Preachain, let us all gather 'round And drive our enemies into the ground The goddess is with us and we fight as one We belong to the Earth, the Sea, and the Sun. Some spend their live struggling to keep up the pace With society's downfall and technology's mace But we as a Clanne seek a higher, deeper call For it's our own inner child that will save us all. Chorus As children of the Crow we will never grow old Our hearts are wild and free And ne'er will we live as slaves to mundanes, We belong to the earth, fire sky, and the sea! Chorus

The Ritual of Lughnasadh by Ceara ni Neill T'was summer, Pennsic XXIV A season close to heart My soul I'd thought lost to hardship and strife And then the ritual began. A seed deep within me I'd found long ago But had feared of its power and not let it grow For I had emotions I could not let show And then the Circle began. The cauldron of water stood still as a mirror To receive the image of the Moon. Sure She rose o'er the hill to spill out her light And touch me, like a spell. Barely conscious was I of activities at hand: The Smudging, the Calling of the Corners; And I shook from inside, feeling the presence Of the gods, gathered with us to stand. One by one, we advanced to kneel And reverence the Moon in the cauldron. I pulled a pebble from the pot, Cold, clear water on my hand, to feel. The grain we threw to the wind so gentle And drank of the mead so sweet When the end of the ritual was announced I found myself sitting, slightly weak. The Powers I'd felt were great and strong Yet soft and gentle and kind And I rose with a sense of renewed inner strength Prepared for a journey long. The presence of the gods that night Induced direction in or lives. Aye, hardship and strife, though perhaps more to come Are passed by, with contented life. T'was summer, Pennsic XXIV A season close to heart. Lughnasadh was the ritual From which my renewed life began, From which my renewed life began.

Sally MacLennane By Shane MacGowan Well Jimmy played harmonica in the pub where I was born He played it from the night -time to the peaceful early morn He soothed the souls of psychos and the men who had the horn And they all looked very happy in the morning. Now Jimmy didn't like his place in this world of ours Where the elephant man broke strong men's necks When he'd had too many Powers So sad to see the grieving of the people that I'm leaving And he took the road to god-knows in the morning. Chorus We walked him to the station in the rain We kissed him and we put him on the train And we sang him a song of times long gone Though we know that we'd be seeing him again. Faraway! So sad to say I must be on my way So put me beer and whiskey cause I'm goin' far away Faraway! I'd like to think I'd be returning when I can To the greatest little boozer and to Sally MacLennane. The years passed by the times had changed I grew to be a man I learned to love the virtues of sweet Sally MacLennane I took the jeers and drank the beers and crawled back home at dawn And ended up a barman in the morning. I played the pump and took the hump and watered whiskey down I talked of whores and horses to the men who drank the brown I hear them say that Jimmy's makin' money far away Some people left for heaven without warning. Chorus When Jimmy came back home he was surprised that they were gone He asked me all the details of the train that they went on Some people they are scared to croak but Jimmy drank until he choked And took the road for heaven in the morning. Chorus

Sheela-Na-Preachain by Lyra filk: Sheela-Na-Gig by P.J. Harvey I've tried to kill them over and over... Look at these my really long sharp swords Look at these my scars for many wars Look at all the fops we've left for dead and You should see our collectin of heads We're killing fops left and right We take their heads and shout all night We sing... Gonna take that head right offa that fop -Put it on a stake and wave it all around Gonna take that head right offa that fop -Throw it in the air and smash it on the ground Gonna take that head right offa that fop Cut off their balls and throw em' in a stew Gonna take that head right offa that fop Watch out now we're coming for you! We say drink your beer, an empty horn is all we fear We say please take those silly Christians away from here We say drink your beer, an empty horn is all we fear We say please take those silly Christians away from here Lager and Blood! Lager and Blood! We are the tastiest! Lager and Blood! Lager and Blood! We are the tastiest! Cut lace off of that foppish head...

Stal-la-la-la-la-la-Leo-Hagan by Rael and Lyra filk: La Bamba by some dead guy (Richie Valens) Sta-la-la-la-la-la-licho! Sta-la-la-la-la-la-licho and Leo and Hagen Sta-licho Stalicho Leo and Hagen Leo and Hagen Leo and Hagen (repeat ad nauseum)

The Mundane Blues by Rael and Lyra It's two weeks 'til Pennsic and I'm scramblin' for some garb I'm checkin' the basemen, the attic and the yard I ain't got no shoes to cover my hairy toes The Bog got my last pair you know how that goes I ain't got no money hiddin' in my cookie jar And the change in my back seat won't go very far The mundane blues

The Woad by Rael filk: The Wait by The Band I woke up real early, tried to fill my coffee cup Saw Mistress Rosimund and Roman about to mix it up I said, "hey Rosimund, do you need a helping hand?" She just grinned and took his head "No" was all she said Chorus Kill a bunch of Romans Kill a bunch for me Kill a bunch of Romans And (and, and, and) you put the woad (put the woad) right on me After the battle, I was drinking long and deep Then a bunch of Romans came by and woke me from my sleep I said, "Hey Phalen, can you help a sleep man? Go out and kill as many Romans as you can" Chorus A bunch of Romans followed me and they caught me in the Bog They said, let's call a truce and sat down on some logs I said, "Hey Romans, you know I'm not a peaceful man." So I severed all their heads and said, "fuck yourselves" instead. Chorus I labored into camp into a dozen bags of ice So Aes came up to me and she offered this advice: She said, "find yourself a Roman and make him carry all your shit. And when you're done, throw him on the firepit. Chorus I went up to market for the midnight madness sale I saw a bunch of Romans and commented on the smell I said, "Hey Romans, why don't you take off all your clothes I'll take you down and drown you in the swimming hole. Chorus

Warrior of the Celts by Steeleye filk: Leader of the Pack Doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom... "Hey, Aurelia, is that him?" "Yeah!" "Wow, he's not bad, but what's that blue shit all over him?" "That's woad!" ************************************************ I saw him standing there, hair and eyes so fair. That's when I fell for The Warrior of the Celts! (Vroom, vroom!) He's always dressed in sheepskin and plaid (plaid, plaid) Unless he's naked and sky-clad (unless he's naked and sky-clad) He's got no guilt or shame (Ooo!) He's earned a fighter's fame (Ooo!) That's why I love him Warrior of the Celts! (Vroom, vroom!) My folks say he's just after our scalps (scalps, scalps) They say he came from the wrong side of the Alps (they say he came from the wrong side of the Alps) They call my needs immodest (Ooo!) But I'm his Triple Goddess (Ooo!) That's why I fuck him Warrior of the Celts! (Vroom, vroom!) The Celts got tired of being put down (down, down) That night they attacked and burned down our town (that night they attacked and burned down our town) They raped Mom till she bled (Ooo!) I helped to chop off Daddy's head (Ooo!) And now we both are Warriors of the Celts! (Vroom, vroom!) ************************************* "Hey, Connor, watch out for that chariot!" Doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom... (Screeeeech! CRASH!) Doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom... "Hey, Aurelia, is that Connor's kid you got there?" *************************************** His head's up on a stake! We use his brainbowl for cornflakes! I'll never forget you Warrior of the Celts!

War Song by Lyra There once was a fop who knew very well Not to wander too close to Preachain And yet this he did and he soon found himself With his head on a stake and his balls on a shelf! Chorus Lager and Blood! We cried thought the night With our beer and our woad And our heads from the fight Lager and Blood! Our victorious cry Never a chance that our foes will survive! When Mistress Rosimund raises her cup And bids that the storms go past Be sure that her words are as strong as she sword For the clods, like the enemy, they fell on their ass! Chorus When the mighty Aes she lowers her gaze To the fighting Roman scum He countenance is a sharp as her sword And with their tails 'tween their legs, their legs Those brave Romans did run! Chorus Well silent Maddog, he raises his sword To shield a feeble blow Then hear his attack, it's as loud as the gods As he slaughters the Romans and beheads all the fops! Chorus Now Peradur is a talented cook Ad he feeds his clannesmen well But in battle we know he's the master of chefs For he carves up the enemy and he stews them in hell! Chorus When Stiletto and Leo and Hagan to charge To spill some Atlantian blood Not a king or a knight or a squire stood at last For the Armadillos they kick royal ass! Chorus Well fine young Drac is a pussycat When in female company But in armor this charmer is a terror at war As he gores the warriors terrified by his roar! Chorus Well Phalen and Cellagh are both brawny and built To withstand any enemy So know then when they go then to battle our foes The carnage they leave will be a feast for the crows! Chorus Now Connal and Feachra make a fearsome duet When they charge with a battle cry So beware their attack when their minds are set For they'll cut off your head and then spit in your eye! Chorus When Rael the conqueror stands to his height He could meet any Tuchux' gaze And watch as he storms to the thick of the fight With a fop squarely sighted in his bloodthirsty gaze! Chorus Now Goldmun and Fionn could both charm any lass With their countenance and grace But see them in their warp spasm And know they would devour anything wearing lace! Chorus When Rea, great warrior, takes to arms on the field To fight for Clanne and kin Her ardor and armor are a funeral pall For the mighty warriors all around her that fall! Chorus Otwell, dear Otwell, he makes us all laugh With his whimsy and mirthful wit But his humor goes over his enemies' head When he say, "Hey boys, wanna paint the town red?" Chorus

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